Fearless Predictions (hey, i have a blog!)

Hey, wait a minute…i have a blog. I can record my predictions somewhere and maybe somebody will read them, yeah…

And i can pick a few outlandish upsets and, and, if i get any of them right, they’ll think i’m a genius, yeah…and maybe i’ll get a €uro-paying job with FIFA and…

Whoa.

Anyway, i have a few minutes and i’ve been wanting to do this for a while now, so i’m going to, in the words of Monty Python, put my head on the chopping block so you can kick it around a little bit. The following World Cup predictions are subject to change with announcements of final rosters and contain more than a pinch of fantastical thinking and perhaps even favoritism. Void where prohibited.

Coming out of group play, i have Germany and Poland; England and Sweden; Netherlands and Serbia & Montenegro; Portugal and Mexico; the USA and Italy; Brazil and Croatia; South Korea and France; Spain and Tunisia. Yes, these are listed in order of finish. And in Group A, i’ll go so far as to say that Germany and Poland both go 2-0-1, with Deutschland taking the tiebreaker.

Gone are Argentina, the Czech Republic, Switzerland and Trinidad & Tobago; look, some teams are going to be bounced early. I’m a bit tentative about including underachievers like Spain, but they’ve got to come through some day, haven’t they? Team USA is my choice as surprise team of the tournament, and i’ll justify my no. 2 seeding for Italy based on their recent history of laissez-faire play allowing them just enough room to squeak by. My favorite example of this fenomeno was in World Cup 1994. In their last match of group play, Team Italia managed a 1-1 draw against Mexico, throwing the quartet into a four-way tie at 1-1-1. By dint of a labyrinth of tiebreakers, Italy limped into tournament play as third seed in the group. Brazil beat them in the finals that year. As for South Korea, home pitch or no, these guys have arrived on the international scene.

In the sweet sixteen, i’ll take Germany over Sweden; Netherlands over Mexico; Poland over England when Becks boots a penalty kick wide and wells up in tears when the final whistle blows; Portugal over Serbia & Montenegro; USA over Croatia as the yanks continue their amazing run; South Korea over Tunisia; Brazil over Italy in an instant classic; and France, fueled by Zidane’s sheer willpower, over Spain.

And then there were eight, until there were four: Germany over Netherlands; USA over South Korea, attaining a measure of revenge in a brilliant rematch of Cup 2002 groupmates; Poland over Portugal – o yes, it could happen; and Brazil over France.

Frozen. I’m considering the implications of the final four i’ve chosen. I’d be pretty confident taking Germany over the USA. But dare i go down as choosing Poland over Brazil? Even accepting this audaciousness, with a final of Germany against Poland, how can i go against the three-time champions with home field advantage?

Would Soccer Bob revoke my poetic license?